Last week, husband, child, and I traveled to the nation's capital for some museum-hopping, 9-year-old style: American History, Air & Space, Natural History, and the Spy Museum. The Hope Diamond was "very disappointing" while the dinosaur and mastodon bone reconstructions were "awesome!" Husband and I loved the Lincoln exhibit at American History (well-told and very inspiring). All three of us were wowed by the Spy Museum.Beautiful weather allowed for a long walk along the mall, past the impressive WWII memorial and the currently-empty reflecting pool, to visit Mr. Lincoln's "temple" and the flanking memorials to the Korean War and the Vietnam War - such powerful reminders.
All in all, a successful spring break trip... with one notable exception.
Most of the "service providers" we encountered "forgot" to smile. As retailers, our radar is set VERY high to the customer service responses of everyone we encounter. We understand that 'smile enforcement' often improves & increases with the quality and cost of service provided (i.e. fast food vs. high end restaurant), but this DC anti-smile trend was overwhelming and pervasive.
It started at the hotel reception.
We walked up to the desk with 2 suitcases and a very excited child, who knew there was an indoor pool. The woman behind the desk glanced up and said "name?"
Really?
No "good morning", no "welcome to the L'Enfant Plaza. Are you checking in with us today?" *sigh*
Maybe she was just having a bad day...
Later, at the cafeteria at the Air & Space Museum, the cashier never looked up from his machine. He simply stood and waited for us to speak. I honestly cannot remember if he even gave us the total. If he did, those were the only words he spoke.
Hmmm...
The next morning, as we were eating at another museum cafeteria (American History), husband said "have you noticed the lack of smiling here?" We both then acknowledged the lackadaisical, uninspired clerks who were sitting in chairs, chins in elbows WHILE THEY RANG UP THE SALES. Huh??? Seriously... imagine your elbow is on your desk, your chin is in your left hand, while your right hand rings up a customer... and you have the picture. A late lunch at a Penn Quarter Cosi gave us the least interested service providers yet... who not only didn't smile, but wouldn't speak above the roar of the ventilation system and screwed up our order to boot.
Curses! We were trapped in a city with a non-smiling epidemic! Our mission: find some smiling people, pronto!
Fortunately, the next morning saved us... of all places, it was a Starbucks. Now, this is a national chain that prides itself on its well-trained, welcoming staff, and that Tuesday morning was no exception. Amid a rush of commuters and morning-coffee-break DC-ites, they smiled at the trio of tourists. They made us feel welcome, and they said thank you. They made us feel like important customers.
Whew.
Here's the thing... what you PROJECT into the world through your facial expressions and body language can create a stronger reaction from others than any words you might speak. We all know the yawn syndrome: whether you're sleepy or not, if you see someone else yawn, your jaw starts to pull in that direction. (I'll bet that just reading this made some of you yawn! I just did.)
The same holds true for smiling (or frowning).
According to a January, 2000 American Psychology Society research report by Swedish psychologists Ulf Dimberg, Monika Thunberg, and Kurt Elmehed:
Studies reveal that when people are exposed to emotional facial expressions, they spontaneously react with distinct facial electromyographic (EMG) reactions in emotion relevant facial muscles. These reactions reflect, in part, a tendency to mimic the facial stimuli.
In layman's terms, this means if you are smiling, someone seeing you is more likely to smile. If you are frowning, they will frown. The next step is the mood change.
It's like the FISH philosophy, that started in the Seattle Pike Place Fish market: there are four "simple but powerful practices" that can change not only your behavior, but the reactions and behavior of those around you. Here are the 4 behaviors practiced by the Seattle fishmongers:
1. Play - bring some fun into your work life. A little laughter goes a long way.
2. Make their day - make someone ELSE happy. A small, sincere compliment will improve their outlook on themselves and on the day (and make them like YOU).
3. Be There - don't let your mind drift away to other things... the party last weekend, the bills at home... be THERE for your customer, guest, friend
4. Choose your attitude - only YOU can choose how to come to work each day. Show up in a bad mood and chances are you'll try to drag everyone down with you all day long. Show up with a sense of optimism and hope, and others will feel your mood.
This week, a good friend told me that I approach life with the glass half-full. I was surprised, because I've always thought of myself as a realist who thinks about what could go wrong in a project/situation/plan and then takes steps to prevent those problems from happening. There is so much in life that we cannot control... but you can control whether you're smiling at the next person you see. It's all about making sweet lemonade out of those tart lemons: Taking the time to notice a cardinal who is having a "bad crest day" on a rainy day makes the rainy day brighter... Try it! You might find it pays forward all the way back to you again.
Oh... and how should you handle it if you encounter a customer service person who isn't smiling? First - try smiling at them. If that doesn't work, and the opportunity exists, please try to let that person's supervisor know. Businesses want their employees to be friendly, first and foremost. If they aren't, we want to know.
I'll end with a shout out to the wonderfully friendly, happy, smiling team you'll find at LaDiff... and if you catch any of them in a mean old scowl, you be sure to let me know, okay?!
